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Tuesday, April 17, 2007

Losing my virginity

No, this is not that kind of post, thank you.

I was feeling pleasantly flattered when I saw the message here asking me to blog for the guys here. I also remembered the groucho marx quote and smiled smugly to myself - after all this was the first time i had got an invite from someone i didn't know to blog for them.

This is it, i thought, the book deals, the lecture tours, the movies and the awards will follow. Lets not forget the royalties! heaps and heaps of royalties. even the illegitimate children of my dog can afford to take it easy and live a life of luxury. Aaah, life will be so sweet.

So then I asked the powers that be 'why me', which is when my conspiracy mindset kicked in.

There is some evil afoot here, a childhood wasted on Robert Ludlums (among many others things) teaches you certains things. You develop an instinct for smelling out conspiracies. Of course, sometimes you have to hit your head on one before you notice it, but what the heck we are not infallible.

And once i discover this evil conspiracy, masterminded by a monstrous megalomaniac, and defeat the powers of darkness - i will become a hero.

And then i will write a book.

And from there will follow the book deals, the lecture tours, the movies and the awards. And lets not forget the royalties! heaps and heaps of royalties. even the illegitimate grand children of my driver's dog can afford to take it easy and live a life of luxury. And life will be sweet again.

So bear with me as I hang around here and figure what's going on. We will talk about the last mile problem between mars and venus next

ps: Feel free to leave some clues in the comments if you know anything about this conspiracy(Enid Blyton and the Five Find Outers have taught me that clues are very important!)

6 comments:

Pri said...

heeeeeee. no conspiracy this but still super exciting no? tell us mr. saint what makes u so saintly?

I am the Walrus said...

Darn... I was excited about the post after I read the title..but it just so happens that the saint is not ready to talk about things like such....

Here's yet another clue... no conspiracy... Oh, and the distance between the two planets is too far.... just.... too far.........

the saint said...

@ pri - i was named after one, thats all, nothing else saintly about me

@ walrus - i am not going to comment on the distance - just the last mile (but it does take forever to cover)

Shweta said...

that post was just a big BLAH to me...n what the heck is the 'heaps n heaps of royalties'..? im lost

May said...

That title of the blog did get me interested for a minute there too....then i realized that i'm not the only special one who got invited to write on this blog. from there on, everything else was a blur...so mr. saint, if there's going to be any royalities that you are going to get from writing in this blog, i believe i've a share in it as well.

the saint said...

@ Shwet/May - i am not sharing any royalties from my book deals, its written into my contract with the powers here.

and @ shweta - it was a big blah, i write like this wonly